Dancing with the Stars Week 6: Maks Loses His Cool

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Welcome to week six of Dancing with the Stars, where our contestants stepped lively to the songs of the Great White Way.

Last week we bid farewell to Queer Eye guy Carson Kressley and saw veteran-turned-actor J.R. Martinez rise to the top of the score sheet. Of the remaining seven contestants, former frontrunner Ricki Lake had the most to prove following the Great Roger Rabbit Debacle of ’80s week, which knocked her off her perch at the top.

This week, the dancers not only had to perform their individual routines, but also participate in a group dance, which sounds dirtier than it really is: A choreographed dance number featuring each duo. Also in attendance were the cast of Sister Act dressed as nuns, doing the can-can. Then Kristen Chenoweth, who is contractually obligated to make an appearance whenever the word “Broadway” is uttered (she just showed up at my apartment), showed up to sing a medley of favorite show tunes.

Let’s see how the teams fared this week:

Biggest shock of the night: The group dance didn’t suck! In fact, watching the stars and the pros dance together was engaging and entertaining television. Especially the part where Nancy Grace was hung upside down by her knees on Tristan MacManus’ shoulders, which could not have been easy.

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Best surprise guest: When he needed a creative director for the group dance, the choreographer turned to Carson Kressley. Selectively adding jazz hands to Broadway numbers might be Carson’s true calling.

Best advice from mom: After his fancy footwork put him in second place last week, Rob Kardashian got a visit from his mother, reality matriarch Kris Jenner. The Kardashian-in-Chief hugged her son and told him,  “It’s time to kick some ass.” Rob nods quickly, because you don’t argue with a woman with a haircut that severe. Hopefully Rob made his mom proud with a 22 for his cha cha to “Walk Like a Man” from Jersey Boys.

Most honest response: After dancing with partner Nancy Grace to “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life” from Spamalot, Brooke Burke-Charvat asked Tristan MacManus, “Is this whole experience more challenging than you thought it would be?” Without pausing, Tristan said, “Yes,” causing Nancy to elbow him in the stomach.

Most surprisingly endearing moment: David Arquette did a quick step to “We Go Together” from Grease, so when he started talking in a pitch perfect Danny Zuko impression, it wasn’t totally unexpected. However, it was quite charming. Maybe David would do better on the show if he channeled John Travolta?

Best costumes: Ricki Lake and Derek Hough were gorgeous in gold sequin. No word on how she made the strapless gown stay up while doing a Guys and Dolls quickstep.

Most groan-inducing moment: After performing an almost perfect dance, Lake and Hough stepped up to the skybox to be interviewed by Brooke Burke-Charvat. Although the couple earned a solid 29 out of 30 points, Brooke asked, “Quick step is like cardio. How much weight have you lost so far?” Even Ricki looked taken aback.

Harshest truth: On a good night, no one wants to follow Ricki Lake on to the dance floor. Tonight it was Chaz Bono’s and Lacey Schwimmer. Their anemic routine to the over-the-top drama of Phantom of the Opera was passable, but in Ricki’s shadow, judge Bruno Tonioli couldn’t help but note, “It’s like watching a cute little penguin trying to be a big menacing bird of prey.” And he was right.

Best Bergeron-ism: Host Tom Bergeron was thrilled to finally have producer and director Kenny Ortega (High School Musical) on the show to choreograph a routine after years of requests. Tom had to ask, “Was it my Simonizing your car that finally sealed the deal?” Oh Tom.

Least likely to go home: J.R. and Karina proved they are going to continue to fight for the frontrunner position with their stellar performance to Chicago. They tied Ricki and Derek for the lead.

Most likely to go home: Soccer star Hope Solo and partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy delivered a shaky and stiff rumba to “Seasons of Love” from Rent. Hope had a hard time loosening up, despite the fact that, in a scene straight out of a bad romantic comedy, Maks brought three members of the Dancing with the Stars troupe to teach her how to be sexy. When Judge Len Goodman declared it her worst dance of the season, Maks rushed to her defense, calling the judges judgmental, which …well, we don’t love him for his way with words. But Maks wasn’t done he then rudely told Len that after 50 years in the biz, maybe it’s time to get out. But wait, there’s more: then he told Brooke Burke-Charvat “This is my show.” I guess someone wore his leather cranky pants today.

Come back tomorrow when we find out who the results of tonight’s competition.

Did Maks go too far in his defense of Hope? Was she as terrible as the judges said she was? Tell us in the comments.

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