Welcome back to Dancing with the Stars, where the ballroom is still reeling from judge Len Goodman’s hissy fit. Following the meltdown, host Tom Bergeron declared,”Len needs a cookie,” but the truth of the matter is, we all needed a cookie in the wake of the epic tantrum, during which Len declared fan favorite pro Derek Hough very fallible and argued that fellow judge Bruno Tonioli couldn’t judge sitting down due to a misplaced piece of wood. (In the words of Monty Python: nudge nudge, wink wink).
Of course he had to dock a few points from the show’s frontrunner American Idol alum Kellie Pickler, who now trails upstart Disney star Zendaya Coleman–recipient of the season’s first perfect score. So who goes home tonight? Hopefully, Len, for a nip of sherry and a good long nap. But one of the stars must leave too, and since it’s the week before the semi-finals, we are all supposed to care just that much more. If you’re wondering about the math and the fact that there are still six couples dancing for fun and profit, the show producers, in their infinite wisdom, are having four couples dance in the finals.
Here’s what happened on Dancing with the Stars:
Most Surprising Reveal: Usual Bottom Two denizen General Hospital star Ingo Rademacher, was announced safe first. His partner, Kym Johnson, didn’t seem to believe it yelling, “WHAT?!” in what seemed to be actual surprise.
Most Surprising Jeopardy: After Len’s sassy critique/raging rant, Kellie and Derek are in jeopardy of going home. This is, of course, malarkey and shenanigans, but still: Shocker!
Repeat Performance: After earning a perfect score for their salsa-rrific threesome with Gleb Savchenko, it was no surprise that the judges asked Zendaya and Val Chmerkovskiy back for another round.
Best Excuse: Baltimore Raven Jacoby Jones, who is not one to hold back with the TMI tidbits, revealed that he, when dramatically ripping his shirt open during his waltz yesterday, somehow gave himself a wedgie. While the physics of that seem impossible, it seemed to interfere with Jones’ performance, which resulted in somewhat lower scores for the Super Bowl champ. Which could explain why he’s in jeopardy this week.
Least Surprising Save: Zendaya and Val, of course.
Best Summary: “Everyone likes their coffee different,” shrugged Kellie as host Brooke Burke-Charvat tried to dig for her feelings about getting a seven from Len.
Worst Lip Syncing: Pop singer Jason Derulo stopped by the DWTS set for an energetic performance of his song “The Other Side.” While it was nice to see the star, who broke his neck a year ago, back on the dance floor, he completely forgot to mouth the words while he danced.
Best Reason To Come Back Next Week: The powers that be asked viewers to tweet their requests for dance styles. Here are the results: Next week, Kellie will dance Flamenco, Ingo will do Charleston, Sean will do Disco, Zendaya will do Hip Hop, Aly will do AfroJazz and Jacoby will do Lindy Hop.
Best Use of Airtime: Some brilliant producer gave Peanut, Ingo Rademacher’s adorable son, a camera crew and let him loose on the set. Highlights include the kid learning some booty-shaking dance moves from Len, telling Sean that he’s going to lose, and breaking it to Jacoby that his “breath smells like a burrito.”
Best Macy’s Stars of Dance Ever? While Len may not like the fact that Derek gets fast and loose with the rules of dance, when it comes to creating dramatic choreography, the pro is truly a star. His performance with Jaimie Goodwin was mesmerizing, gravity defying and dizzyingly good. Seriously, watch it:
Best Way To Tick Off Ringo: Invite Emeli Sandé to perform her hit “Next To Me,” off her chart-busting, record breaking debut album Our Version of Events, which just broke The Beatles’ record for longest run ever for a debut album. Sorry “Please Please Me”!
(PHOTOS: Celebrating The Beatles as Please Please Me Turns 50)
Most Obvious Judging: Olympic star Aly Raisman is safe, while Bachelor Sean Lowe is in jeopardy.
Bottom Three: Sean joins Kellie and Jacoby in the Bottom Three and with that line-up, barring some shocking twist, it’s pretty clear who will – or at least should – be leaving the show tonight.
Who Goes Home? After admirable efforts to look surprised by their saves, Kellie and Jacoby were safe. Bachelor Sean Lowe is finally free to go plan his ABC-sponsored wedding to his prize/fiancée Catherine Giudici. Now they can finally have that talk about her feelings when he left Peta at the altar during his dance yesterday!