It’s Stevie Wonder Week on Dancing with the Stars, which means all the stars were stepping lively to the R & B legends sassiest songs — and the man himself even stepped foot on the dance floor for a performance with the troupe. But having one of the greatest R & B singers alive perform on set isn’t enough to whet Dancing with the Stars’ appetite for dance destruction. So, in addition to it being Stevie Wonder week, it is also group-dance week, where the stars are divided into teams helmed by point leaders-turned-captains Kellie Pickler and Zendaya Coleman to compete against each other while wearing Spandex. It’s like Thunderdome but with more body glitter.
Here’s what happened on Dancing with the Stars:
Strangest Musical Choice: For some reason, Stevie Wonder didn’t sing all of Stevie Wonder’s songs — even though Stevie Wonder was right there. Makes you wonder, Stevie.
Second Strangest Musical Choice: For some reason, having a living legend on stage wasn’t enough for the DWTS producers who opted to add upstart country crooner Hunter Hayes to the stage as well. It was a wildly unnecessary addition: no offense Hunter, but no one comes off well next to Stevie.
Truest Fact: 16-year old Disney star Zendaya announced, “If you don’t love Stevie Wonder, there’s something wrong with you.” Amen, sister. Then she danced an excellent cha-cha which Carrie-Ann Inaba called, “Perfection in motion.” They earned 29/30 for the effort.
Best Move Stealing: At the end of his samba, Andy Dick gave Carrie-Ann a rose, a move he clearly swiped from his competitor Bachelor Sean Lowe. While sweet, it didn’t help his scores, he earned only 18/30
Best Bruno-ism of the Night: When Bachelor Sean finished his unseemly samba, which he performed sans shirt, Bruno Tonioli could think of nothing to say but, “Look on the bright side — you can always get a job as a stripper!” Their score: 21/30
Best Professionalism: Olympian Aly Raisman may have been distracted during rehearsals due to the attack on her hometown of Boston, but none of it showed during her foxtrot to “Isn’t She Lovely,” which Bruno deemed “pretty as a picture.” She earned 27/30
Best Plea For Votes: General Hospital star Ingo Rademacher made sure to mention that it was his birthday several times during his performance and judging. You can’t vote him off on his birthday can you, America? His tango earned 24/30.
Most Useless Bickering: After Kellie and Derek’s quickstep, the judges all started sniping at one another, accusing each of being finicky and grousing across the table. All that, despite the fact that they all loved the dance, doling out 29 points, and putting Kellie at the top of the leaderboard. Good use of primetime, guys!
Nicest Attempt At Niceness: Despite the fact that Len Goodmand did not enjoy boxer Victor Ortiz’s rumba at all, he took the time to congratulate him on making it farther than any other boxer has on the show. Then he gave him an 18/30 for Victor’s “airline safety drill” (according to Bruno) dance moves.
Best Mom: When Len attempts to critique NFL player Jacoby Jones’ quickstep, Jacoby’s mom shouts at the judge. While Len claims he doesn’t want to get in a fight with Jacoby’s mom, it’s clear he knows that she could take him. He does soften the blow by saying that, while Jacoby did a good job with a hard dance, it just wasn’t his night. Their score: 23/30
Biggest (Disco) Balls: Kellie, Aly, Seanand Andy earned 25 extra points for their Team Samba, which was a charming homage to a ’70s “discotheque” beginning with a ring-around-a-rosie move surrounding a GIANT mirrorball. Zendaya, Ingo, Jacoby, and Victor only got 22 points added to their solo scores with a Team Paso that Carrie-Ann dubbed, “sloppy and messy,” but still had its moments.