If your slasher movie night starts to seem eerily autobiographical, immediately turn on the lights and make sure all the kitchen knives are accounted for. If there have been any recent reports of asylum breakouts or mysterious demonic rituals, stay away from scary movies. You’re probably in one. Actually, stay away from all screens. Poltergeist and The Ring all had sequels for a reason.
Top 10 Ways To Survive A Horror Movie
With the release of the fourth Scream film comes a fresh cast of hopeful horror survivors. TIME brings you the rules to follow if you want to make it out alive.
Never Watch A Horror Movie When You’re In One
Full List
Surviving in a Horror Flick
- Don’t Ever Investigate Or Say You’ll “Be Right Back”
- Turn Around, Because It’s Always Behind You
- Never Watch A Horror Movie When You’re In One
- Make Sure Your Car is Always in Perfect Working Order
- Don’t Ever Split Up
- When Haunted, Just Move Out of the Damn House
- Wear Comfortable Shoes
- Avoid Proms and All Other High School Parties
- Always Assume Your Attacker Is Still Alive
- Keep Your Pants On
