It’s Part 3, so you need three villains. You see the logic? No? Us neither. And three villains require three plotlines, which is definitely one too many. Sandman (Thomas Haden Church), Venom (Topher Grace) and a new Green Goblin (James Franco) all have a go at Spidey, and the result is a muddled mess. Everybody gets screen time, which means no one gets quite enough. And, dear God, please don’t even get us started on emo Peter Parker — a black-clothes-wearing Tobey Maguire wearing his hair across his face like the world’s biggest Morrissey fan. It’s also hard to imagine what director Sam Raimi was thinking when he choreographed a cheeseball several-minutes-long dance scene with Maguire and Bryce Dallas Howard’s Gwen Stacy.