Illustration by Francisco Caceres for TIME; Salahis: Gerald Herbert / AP; Samantha Appleton / Whitehouse / AP; Woods: Matt Sullivan / Reuters
In the coming print edition of TIME, my Tuned In column is about your two big media distractions of the week, and how Tiger Woods and the Salahis respectively represent an old- and new-fangled strain of celebrity: the attention-controller and the attention-seeker. Not that this was a particularly good week for either group.
Dear celebrities and pseudocelebrities: Please don’t crash anything else, literally or figuratively, at least until I go on vacation. Thank you.