7:25: We’re set to go Chez Tuned In. The laptop is charged; the chips are ready; and Tuned In Jr. and Tuned In Jr. Jr. are primed for their first Olympic Opening Ceremonies. Mrs. Tuned In and I have told them that this will be an exciting show, much better than the Movie Night they would have had otherwise.
The boys may as well get used to disappointment early in life.
I have the Tivo running as a backup, so I may fall somewhat behind the actual “live” broadcast. So what? If NBC can air the ceremonies 12 hours late, I can time-shift too!
In fact, that should be NBC’s slogan: “It’s not tape-delayed! We just Tivoed it for you!”
“Live”blog continues after the jump:
7:26: Nothing yet. Just typing this so there will be something after the jump.
7:31: “The clock of their lives has been beating with a screaming urgency.” A clock beats? Tuned In Jr. Jr.: “The buildings look like Kung Fu Panda.” Not the last such reference tonight, I’m guessing.
Also: “It’s not the triumph but the struggle.” Mrs. Tuned In: “Oh, it’s totally the triumph.”
7:40: Tom Brokaw gives an overview of the Games as a moment for “China to stand tall.” Mentions the protests along the torch route over Tibet and Darfur (“Their self-image was not shared by many others in the world”). His narration touches all the bases you’d expect—there are a couple “long marches,” natch—but he doesn’t sugarcoat China’s authorritarianism and mentions the possibility of protest during the Games.
7:49: Matt Lauer looks very ruddy in HD. Too much base?
7:53: First glimpse of the U.S. team in their opening-ceremonies uniforms. I prefer Korto’s.
8:00: The ceremony begins! Bring on the puzzling symbolic dances!
8:01: Great. Now the children are going to want light-up drums.
8:03: I believe the Chinese just exploded the Eye of Sauron. Did Peter Jackson work on the ceremonies?
8:07: OK, all snark aside, the synchronized drumming and vast sea of 2,008 identical drummers is awesome. Also kind of terrifying. Apparently they were told in rehearsal to smile more. Still terrifying. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear this was done in CGI.
8:08: It’s 8:08 on 8/8/08. That makes this the luckiest post of the evening. Nonetheless, a commercial break just started.
8:17: The obligatory children’s segment. On the one hand: adorable. On the other: inadvertent reminder that most forms of child labor in China not quite so adorable. Sorry, was that not in the Olympic spirit?
8:21: Tuned In Jr. now able to identify Omega watch commercial within approximately 2.3 seconds.
8:22: Dancers “foot-painting” on giant LED scroll again extremely cool. Children convinced it is the Dragon Scroll from Kung Fu Panda, which I realize has now definitively colored their view of China for life.
8:28: Disclosure: NBC’s Chinese-culture color commentator, Joshua Cooper Ramo, is a former TIME colleague. His nuggets of context are intriguing—”for the Chinese, there is no distinction between the art and the artist”—although for all I know, his is making them up on the fly. (Seriously—make up some mumbo-jumbo about China that involves a paradox or a yin-yang contrast and Westerners will pretty much believe anything.)
8:30: Commercial break. I feel like I’m enjoying the performance more than in most opening ceremonies. I’m on my first beer, so I believe this feeling is genuine. I wonder if it’s partly because—so far—the imagery and iconography draws on ancient Chinese culture, rather than the sort of symbolic modern-art hoo-hah that dominates so many of these shows.
8:37: Coca-Cola commercial. The little animated birds building a “bird’s nest” stadium out of straws would be more adorable if they did have one cutely admiring a window display of roasted poultry. Though I bet those little Coca-Cola birds would be delicious with duck sauce.
8:42: The mass displays of humanity! People standing inside giant blocks! Wielding giant oars in massive lines! All that teeming unison! I think they may have enlisted all 1.3 billion people in this show.
8:44: Good to see Chuck getting the promotional love.
8:50: If the message Beijing is devoted to communicating through this Olympics is, China can get people to work together in unison: mission accomplished. It also speaks very well for the country’s large LED screens.
8:55: OK, while the 2,008 people running in light-up suits is again very visually impressive, it’s the fist bit that’s kind of hokily futuristic in the usual Olympic way. Something very Tron-like about them.
8:56: Tuned In Jr. Jr. has commenced entertaining himself with one of Mrs. Tuned In’s flip-flops. Nothing personal, Beijing.
8:58: Lot of upscale car ads this evening. Is a Friday-night Olympics audience really that well-heeled?
9:01: “Water is very important culturally here.” OK, I’ve got to call them out on this one. Anyone know a world culture where water isn’t culturally significant?
9:03: That said, the aerials of 2,008 Tai Chi masters arrayed in perfect concentric circles are amazing. I want to record this and play it on a loop on my TV all day long. (This is, by the way, one of the events for which HD really does make a difference. I am receiving no kickbacks from Panasonic for saying that.)
9:06: The Tuned In Jrs. have given up and gone to bed. It’s always the youngest who suffer most from tape delay.
9:10: OK, so the birds represent “a moment when the birds return, when the conflicts between man and nature have been resolved, and where a model that allows both prosperity and environmentalism flourishes”? I realize we’re not exactly eco-perfect in the States, either, but is this not the city where you could pretty much scoop the air with a shovel a week ago?
9:15: A giant, banded blue sphere is rising from the floor. The Earth? Or is the ceremony sponsored by AT&T?
9:20: With the long, syrupy, One World ballad—complete with Kodak-ad snapshots of The Children of the World—the ceremonies have finally, officially gone on long enough. And with that, they end! With fireworks! Which are actually culturally relevant for once!
9:25: All right, brief episodes of crankiness aside, this was a visually impressive and surprisingly un-cheesy Opening Ceremony. Now, the Parade of Nations is about to start, and I doubt I have enough laptop battery charge to make it to Bhutan. Because of that—and the fact that I suspect no one is still reading this liveblog—I’m signing off for the evening. Enjoy the fashion show. Take it away, Greece!