Tuned In

Celebrity Apprentice: Everybody Is a Star

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NBC Photo: Justin Stephens

Question of the Day: Which reality show is more badly misnamed–Dancing with the Stars (a.k.a. “Dancing with Where the Hell Is She From Again?”) or The Celebrity Apprentice?

The list of Donald Trump’s, ahem, celebrities–whose show debuts January 3–was released today, and is herewith reproduced and annotated:

Trace Adkins: I’ll give them this one, only because I may not be country enough to recognize him.

Carol Alt: Most famous person named for a key on your computer keyboard. [Update: Sorry, that would actually be Tab Hunter.]

Stephen Baldwin: A.k.a., “No, not that Baldwin. No, not that one either.”

Nadia Comaneci: Pro: You have heard of her. Con: You cannot spell her name.

Tiffany Fallon: A Playboy centerfold, so since Mrs. Tuned In and my female editors read this blog, I’m gonna say I’ve never heard of her either.

Jennie Finch: Women’s softball pitcher. Madam, you are no Nadia Comaneci.

Nely Galan: 1. Produced The Swan. 2. That’s right, produced. 3. Does not even have a Wikipedia page. [Update: Not even en espanol.]

Marilu Henner: Major celebrity. I will brook no disagreement!

Lennox Lewis: Um, more famous than Jennie Finch?

Piers Morgan: Judged America’s Got Talent. Slightly more famous than Nely Galan.

Omarosa: Formerly of Not-Celebrity Apprentice.

Tito Ortiz: Please God, let there be an Ultimate Fighting component to this show.

Vincent Pastore: Apparently too famous for Dancing with the Stars. Exactly famous enough for Celebrity Fit Club 4.

Gene Simmons: Daddy needs a new set of family jewels.